How Can I Protect My Father From His Wife Re: Medical Decisions?

Question by Lori G: How can I protect my father from his wife re: medical decisions?
How can I protect my father from his wife re: medical decisions?
My father has been in the hospital since the 2nd of January. There is various medical problems including: Prostrate cancer, possibly alcoholism, dehydration & malnutrition and various other maladies. I know for sure that my dad does NOT want to be there and his wife wants him to go to a rehab center (I believe for alcoholism). He has been sedated and in restraints for a couple of weeks. He has tried to leave the hospital but his wife is controlling what happens. He has asked me to contact a lawyer to begin divorce proceedings. He says he wants to live but on HIS terms, not on those his wife chooses for him. Tonight they transferred him to a geriatric psych facility against his wishes. My brother is boarding the plane now to get out there. All I care about is making sure that his wishes are granted because ultimately that is all that is important.

Help, please. We know that the wife has primary decision making power by virtue of their marriage but he does not want her to make decisions for him. What can we, his kids, do to make sure that we can have her rights superseded? I talked to a lawyer today but he was somewhat reluctant to get involved because of the muddy issues with the wife. There was also some talk about the hospital not letting him be released. So my questions are:
1. Can we get a power of attorney so that we can make the medical decisions (do what he wants) for him, instead of his wife?
2. Can we just walk him out of the hospital without the hospitals consent?

This is in Arkansas.
Any other information that you might have that you might have come across because of your own experiences would be soooo helpful. Thank you so much.
Douglas: Thank you so much for your answer, but I do believe he has the right to live out his life the way he wants. I would NEVER agree to restrain someone like that. He has detoxed now for about 20 days and I’m not convinced that alcohol is as big of a program for him as his wife says (not my mother, his 2nd wife). I just don’t think anyone has the right to choose for how someone else should live out the rest of their days. By-the-way, no inheritance so that is not a factor in my decisions (he’s leaving it in a trust for the grandkids education).

Best answer:

Answer by chet374
Yes he can sign medical decisions in case he is incompetent to anybody he wants. He also has the right to sign out of the hospital if he is with it. he will have to sign a paper AMA leaving the hospital against medical advice.

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