How to Save My Little Brother?
Question by Rachel: How to save my little brother?
My family life has always been a train wreck. I’m 16 and a Junior in high school. I have 5 siblings. I’m the second youngest. The first four kids are from my moms ex husband, I have my own father, and so does my little brother. Anyway, I’m not going to get into everything because I want to focus on my little brother. He’s 12 and has been living with his father for almost 5 year now. My mom mom moved my older sister, my little brother and I from california to Chandler, Arizona almost 5 years ago also. My little brother’s father claimed that my mother had kidnapped him (although he knew perfectly well we were moving, even came over when we were packing. We gave him our new address and everything) and when my mom couldn’t make the court date my brother was forced to live with his dad in Irvine, CA. It’s been 5 years and we have been allowed to see him once since he left and that night ended terribly with everyone screaming at eachother and my little brother crying. We’re not allowed to talk to him on the phone very often and when we can, it’s for a few minutes and my brother sounds exhausted and miserable. When We secretly got to skype with him once, we found out that he was being abused. His father has borderline personality disorder and has a police record of domestic violence with his ex-wife and when he punched my oldest sister in the mouth when I was 5 years old. When we skyped, my brother stated that whenever he said to his father he wanted to go back to arizona with us that his father would hold him down and hit him. he revealed that we was also being emotionally abused when he said that his dad yells at him and blames him for everything that goes wrong. His dad got into a car accident and blamed my little brother when another baby (his dads OTHER son) in the car was injured. His father has told manly lies to get money off of him. He says that my mother is abusive and can’t take care of him. His dad forced him to skip grades and has him studying CALCULUS and other ridiculous courses. HE’S 12 YEARS OLD! It sounds unbelievable but it’s true! ITS RIDICULOUS! He gets punished when his scored aren’t high enough to get into stanford or harvard. MAYBE IT’S BECAUSE HE’S A CHILD! He should be in elementary school or middle school, playing with friends! His father did the same thing to his older son. He’s obbssesed with living through his children. I feel like everyone in my family has given up on him! None of my older brothers and sisters have done anything to help my mom get him back. My mom is too poor to afford an attorney and i feel she has given up too! She can barely afford to take care of me, I don’t even know if she can take care of my brother anymore. She hasn’t called the police, she’s doing nothing to get my little brother back. Anthony was the closest friend I had. Without him, I’m nothing. I want him back before he becomes abusive himself. I’m so scared for him and I feel so helpless because I’m only 16 and I have no power over this. Please help me help Anthony. I don’t know what to do. I want him to know that we still love him and think about him. I can imagine that Anthony feels abandoned by my mother and helpless. He’s my everything and I’ve been so depressed since he left. Please what can I do?
What I really want to do is graduate early, start working, and take in my little brother but I don’t know how I’m going to. I’m willing to get sign myself off into the military and send money to my mom to take care of him but I’m just clueless and sad. I don’t know what to do.
Best answer:
Answer by Lorraine
Step one is to contact the Orange County, CA district attorney’s office. Have the name of the child’s father,address, etc. available, along with any other information, if you can put it together. Father’s date of birth, social security number, etc. In other words, the more information you can provide, the easier it will be.
What needs to happen here is the appointment of a guardian ad litem to advocate for your minor brother. This means that an investigation will take place to determine if your brother is in an unsafe situation. If it is determined that he is, the guardian, who is an attorney,will make a recommendation to the court to change the custody order.
Provided that your mother does not have anything that would be held against her such as chronic alcoholism, drug abuse or prostitution, the lack of “moral turpitude” on her part should allow her to regain custody of your brother.
You should contact the DA’s office first thing Monday morning.
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